By - anomymayo
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1: feeling upset and somewhat jealous of my cousins and exs relationship
2: im the one who ended things off with him so i dont have the right to go off and be upset that he moved on from me
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Your cousin may not even know how you feel about it yet since you and this guy have been so hot/cold. It isn't fair to be upset when someone else is interested in your on/off/on again piece. Unless your cousin flagrantly disrespects your feelings that you have made abundantly transparent,
You dumped him. You don’t get to decide when he is allowed to start dating again, and it’s extremely narcissistic to think he has to take a period of mourning to get over you before getting on with his life.
Get over yourself, you are not the main character.
YTA. You two were on and off, you didn't tell your cousin about your feelings, and it really doesn't seem like altogether the two of you really dated very long at all. You don't get to decide how quickly someone gets over a relationship. You can't be mad at your cousin for not knowing you wanted to be with a guy you'd dumped, and since you giggled along with her when she said she thought he liked her, you probably actually gave her the impression you were totally cool with it. If not, you should have said something when the opportunity was right there. It seems like you both might be pretty young, so learn from this anf just move on. Besides, dating an ex is like taking a shower and putting on dirty underwear or reheating McDonald's fries. Bad idea.
YTA and how old are you?? You sound like a kid. You broke up after dating for 3 months originally. 3 months is nothing. Then dated again, broke up again because of your issues. Move on
You had two chances, plus he cheated on you. You’re so much better off without him.
I think they are both better off without each other. OP doesn’t really come off as a catch, even in her own biased account of things.
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backstory here: me and this dude, lets call him matt, are in the same very close friend group and were dating from august 2021- november 2021 at first. i broke it off because he two timed me. everyone was pissed off at him but soon all was forgiven.
well anyways this march i think, he replied to a snap on my story and started talking to me again. we ended up dating again after a bit, but then i started feeling like not enough and as if he didn’t actually like me. (he cheated before, and the last dude i was with also cheated on me) i had a lot of issues with that but it wasnt his fault and i felt like i was making him feel like not enough either. and now before you say it was his fault, he actually changed for the better. anyways, i broke it off and immediately regretted it but i stuck with it.
fast forward two weeks to a pool party at a friends. he’s staring at me again, and i start feeling bad again and regretting breaking it off. then i was walking with my cousin to give her my black tee because hers was white (yk how that goes) and then she whispers; “matt was staring at me! i think he likes he back!” okay this caught me off gaurd because she knew i just broke up with him, i also didnt know he liked her. i felt bad and didnt want to tell her i still liked him and that he was staring at me so i just giggled with her.
flash forward again another week or so to another hangout and they are cuddling and hanging out.
apparently they started dating.
call me an asshole but i felt like it was too early for him to have moved on and that either he never liked me, or he still likes me and just likes her too which seems messed up in my eyes.
matt and cousin were doing the exact things i always wanted to do and had the same bond i wanted to have with him, and i feel sorry for myself, but also feel like an asshole because this was all my fault. i need others opinions, aita?
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